Emails with Crystal

Me: Hey, check out my sister’s soy sauce commercial here:

Crystal: Wow! Great commercial! That’s some serious sauce.

Me: Thanks! It’s almost as good as those Axe commercials, right? By the way can you tell which one is my sis?

Crystal: By the way yes! She was the one driving the car! Pretty good too 4 an Asian. Jk. What are u up to these days?

Me:  i’ve been trying to lose weight. So I ate like a pound of ricotta cheese. For some reason, in my head, this was healthy. Then I realized I had mixed up ricotta cheese with cottage cheese. Totally different fat content.

But it was delicious. I also forgot I’m lactose intolerant. What are you up to? I’m interviewing for fellowship programs in pediatric heme-onc.
Crystal: The ricotta by the pound program was soooo 2010. Everyone is doing the Limburger diet now. Come on Dao! Don’t tell me you were tricked. 
I’ve been doing research and applying for fellowship too. I will have a real job by the time I’m getting my AARP card.  

Other than that I am spending most of my days strumming a banjo to old Whitney Houston hits and trying not to get in trouble with the law. 
Me: I think I might be in the same boat as you with the AARP thing. But life’s a journey right? A long, unfulfilling journey…
I’m doing the prisoners diet now- nothing but bread and water that I get people to slide under my door at random times of day, just out of reach from my chained hands. Then they kick me and it gets kinda ‘ s and m’-y from there. Keeps you motivated and on-track. 
I just made that up, but I think it’s a genius idea
Published in: on February 17, 2012 at 2:36 am  Leave a Comment  

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