The seafood’s been alright. I was hoping for something spectacular. I’ve had crabcakes at three different places now. One was a nameless dump I just happened upon, but their crabcakes were pretty good. I don’t know the name of the place, just that it was near a gentleman’s club and you had to buy the drinks out of a vending machine.
Then I met up with my friend from med school, Smitha.
Me: What a happy coincidence you just happened to be in Baltimore when I was. I wasn’t going to explore this place on my own.
Smitha: I know, what are the chances? It’s goes to show this is a small world.
Me: Yeah, it is. But then…why did it have to be with you? Why it couldn’t have been with someone more exciting?
Smitha: I know! Of course I don’t meet my soul mate this way.
Me: Just your dopey friend Jasmine.

Smitha and I go to Mo’s Fisherman’s Wharf, where Rachel Ray declared it the best crabcakes in town (the locals must hate hearing this non-stop). It was REALLY good, and only 5 bucks more than shady nameless place (15 bucks for a crabcake). That was what I was expecting from Maryland crabs. I wanted to slow clap after every bite.

After the airplane fiasco, I am stuck near the airport. I am afraid to too far away from the airport. But I hear there is a place 2 miles away with great crabcakes. G&M. So I walk there. I actually walk the wrong way at first and end up at a closed location. So I walk another 2 miles to the real restaurant. And it was not worth it.
Once jennifer and I tried to make cookies from scratch, which we fed to our cousin Philip. They were bad, very bready, the cookie part somehow tasted like flour and baking soda and sugar separately. They somehow did not combine to make ‘cookie’. We ate the chocolate chips only out of those.
These crabcakes were like that. It was huge, lots of crab meat with scant breading but the breading still offended me. And people, I like eating bread and water. I like plain grits. I like mush. I’m not asking for lots of spices. In college I would sometimes mix a bit of cornmeal with hot water and eat just that to save on money. This was less tasty than those. It had no flavor, and just made me angry I was getting full on on it.
So like what philip jennifer and I did with the chocolate chips I did with the crabmeat. I picked out all the crab and ate just that. but the crab meat was worse than imitation crab, less flavorful. It tasted like ocean water diluted with bland. I don’t see why people rave about it. It made me sad.

Apparently THE place to get crabcakes is Faidley’s, or Mo’s. Faidley’s actually mails theirs out, but I don’t know if it’s worth the price. I’m at the airport now, with a 3.99 filet o’ fish meal, and I think I should have just stuck with that all along.

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Published in: on April 18, 2011 at 3:42 pm  Leave a Comment  

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