I’m stuck in Baltimore.

So the original plan for today was:
1) Wake up
2) Walk to the harbor
3) Eat a lot of crabcakes
4) Go home

What happened was
1) Raining- can’t walk to harbor. Go hide under bus station shelter
2) Listen to the guys under the shelter talk about passing girls who give them hard-ons, even the pregnant ones
3) Move out of the shelter into the rain. Rain is not letting up.
4) Feel cold. Zip up my French Connection UK hoodie, so now it the FCUK abbreviation is very clear. I wore it because it was one of my heavier jackets.
5) Eat a squished stale Subway sandwich. Find out my credit cards are janky.
6) Go to airport. Find out all the flights have been delayed by hours due to rain.
7) Hungry again. Order pasta. Apparently 3 people ordered pasta ahead of me and they can only make it one at a time.
8) Get back in time to see my plane leave without me.
9) Spend another night in Baltimore, this time at a cheaper hotel with what appears to be a wall of one-way mirrors (you know, like the observation rooms in PPM).
10) Feel creeped out.
11) Hungry again. Jennifer orders me Pizza Hut pasta. I take a photo of me and food. They didn’t leave me silverware. I eat the pasta with a paper cup for a spoon.
12) Feel lonely.
13) Wonders how it’d work if I hired a hooker just to be my friend for the night. Maybe not a good idea. I’d have to explain how I wasn’t using the word ‘friend’ as a code or as a euphemism. And it’ll be waste of time anyways, we’d probably have different opinions on books.

– Daniel ordered me pizza too, but it was the previous night. And all the pizza workers wished me a happy birthday.

Published in: on April 17, 2011 at 2:58 am  Comments (3)  

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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. What does janky mean??

  2. You always have the best stories. Happy to hear you did find some good crabcakes while you were there. Of course, pizza is good too.

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