Day 2

We wake up to a beautiful morning. The air is crisp and refreshing as water in a cool creek. I take a walk and wonder why leaf piles make me want to jump in them. My dog Addy used to like jumping into leaf piles as a puppy too. Maybe it’s instinct. The trees are colorful. I think I want to live in Pennsylvania.

Nancy comes to the house and I meet her other friends and bridesmaids. Our pre-wedding conversation includes discussions about the hedonic treadmill and, much later, why, if Asian people point with their middle finger, is the middle finger not called the pointer finger?

Ilir and the boys go golfing, even though none of them really golf. One of them was proud he got close to par.


Ryan (Moriko’s (sp?) husband): I’ve golfed before.

Moriko: No you haven’t.

Ryan: Yes I did, in high school. My friends and I would go to the golf course and we’d hunt for frogs at the ponds.

Moriko: That’s not golfing

Nancy: Wait, this was in high school?


As a bridesmaid, I get my hair done by Sandy and makeup done by Stacy. Note to self: make friends who will be useful at weddings.

Nancy hands us our scarves by proxy, as she is busy getting made up too. She has embellished them and added tags. Very cute. Her dress was custom made and one of the most beautiful dresses I’ve seen because it is uniquely her style. We all agree that if I have a wedding it’d be in pajamas.

Lots of guys walk into the room, and get yelled at saying they can’t see the bride. Nancy has to point out each time that the dude is not the groom, so it’s ok.

There’s something that’s really beautiful, but we can’t take a picture of it because it’d ruin the moment. So everyone in the room resolves to remember the picture in our minds. I have no memory of the actual scene, just of the pact. Dammit.

The wedding is outdoors. The weather is perfect like I already said. The girls are pretty and the guys are handsome, but wearing fedoras. They look like they might be in a glee club. Individually, the hats are awesome. Mike overhears Nancy’s relatives from China trying to figure out the hats. They decide that it must be a tradition in Ilir’s country, and that all the groomsmen are from Kosovo too. The ringbearer and the flowergirl both get stage fright.

Nancy makes a speech to her parents that make us cry. When she says “Mom, I knew that you were the only one, before Ilir, who would take care of me no matter what,” I know she says this with complete and utter confidence, as a simple truth. Yes, Ilir is the one who will, from now until foreve. I think of the excerpt from a poem I found months ago, “I love you more each day. More than yesterday, less than tomorrow.” That is Ilir and Nancy. No one asks me to say any words, so the poem is kept inside.

We eat a bunch of cheese and then go to the reception. The flowergirl gets over her stage fright and starts picking the flowers from the flowerpots to throw. Her mom stops her.

 Nancy’s dad gives a speech that includes financial and diet advice. Nancy’s mom tells us a sweet story of Nancy as a child, and makes comparisons between Walter and Nancy. She says when it’s Walter’s big day she’ll be nice to him then.

We talk and watch a slide show with a little animation of how Ilir and Nancy met. Will post when I can get it.  Nancy and Ilir dance to Cat Steven’s The Wind. Best song ever. We dance to the best of our abilities. We use the scarf as a limbo stick and then as a jump rope, in desperate attempts at new moves. How do you dance to Let it be?

Kevko and I notice the piano and try to get the other to play. He reminds me of my cousin Trung, down to his humble ‘I can’t play the piano’ when you can tell he really can.  Since he didn’t dance with us, I tell him he owes us a performance. So he goes and plays a melody that sounds haunting and it’s impressive as he’s pushing all these keys (unlike my frankenstein monster mashing of chords style of play). I have a sense of nostalgia when I hear it.

Tina: I wish I ‘can’t play’ the piano too.

Me: Wow, what song was that?

Kevin: I learned it off of Youtube.

Me: Yeah, but what’s the name? I want to learn it.

Kevin: Um, it’s kinda cheesy.

John (walks up): Do you know any other video game songs? Anything else from ChronoTrigger?

Me: You are a dork.

Kevin: I know.

Weirdly enough, ChronoTrigger was a video game I played with Trung back in the 90s. I told you they remind me of each other.

Listen to the song here Kevin actually plays it a little different but you get the gist.

Published in: on October 19, 2010 at 4:09 am  Comments (7)  

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7 CommentsLeave a comment

    • you read a blog called donkeyshines?
      and I would think my pajama wedding would be more dignified, while avoiding the appearance of an upperclass orgy.

      • no! i just googled ‘pajama wedding’ and that’s the one i found.
        yes! a pajama wedding should be at a classy place. the only thing unusual would be the pajamas.

  1. just for the record, i have no close relatives in or from china. i guess they are just fobby.

    and i’m sorry i didn’t make you read anything at the wedding!! i told you a while ago about my idea to have the bridesmaids do that. so sorry. ilir is a minimalist and wanted to keep the wedding as short as possible. thank you so much for sharing, though. the words are beautiful.

    chronotrigger?? i don’t know what that is but it sounds nerdy!! and the fact that you guys all knew what it was is funny. (disclaimer: i don’t claim to not be a nerd.)

    • oh man, yeah sorry. They’re just fobby.
      Wait, so where are your relatives from? Do i not know you at all!?

      • all of my relatives are in the u.s.! i have distant relatives in taiwan and china. but my parents are not even from china. they are from taiwan. we are chinese though.

      • I remembered your parents were from someplace asian. Please forgive me, I had a US public education and my geography is poor.

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